Bounty Hunter

episode transcript by Sarah Spearey

Police Station Cafeteria: Day

(Starsky sits across the table from Hutch and Abby Crabtree (Deadly Imposter) while they are eating)

Starsky: Hutch, it’s right here in black and white.

Hutch: You don’t really believe that crocodiles are responsible for killing more people every year than any other single cause do you?

Starsky: Then why would they print it if it wasn’t true?

Hutch: It doesn’t make any sense.

Starsky: Well, a lot of things don’t make sense. Like the two of you eating those butterfly bones. That doesn’t make sense. That doesn’t necessarily mean it isn’t true.

Abby: They’re banana chips.

Starsky: Banana chips, butterfly bones, what’s the difference? You’re still eating them. (Starsky and Abby dispose of their plates)

Abby: David, you’re impossible.

Hutch: Oh, you’ve noticed. Here. (Hands Starsky his plate)

Starsky: Thank you.

Abby: Gotta go. Don’t forget to take your vitamins.

Hutch: Yeap. (Stands up and they kiss) See you tomorrow, huh?

Abby: And we’ll see you Friday night?

Starsky: For the final feast before you plunge into another of your two day fasts. I wouldn’t miss it for the world.

Abby: Don’t forget the blackstrap molasses and the impregnated wheat germ.

Hutch: Oh, don’t worry. (Kiss and she leaves)

Starsky: Blackstrap molasses and impregnated wheat germ? And you tell me I’m whacko.

Hutch: What the lady wants, the lady gets. It’s called technique Starsk. (They head for the door and a uniformed officer with a lady) What I don’t understand is what’s wrong with these two.

Starsky: What? These two. What do you mean?

Hutch: Well, you’ve watched police story haven’t you? You know a cop’s not supposed to be happily married. That’s the number one rule.

Starsky: Oh? Oh. Well, maybe I oughta call Captain Dobey and report the two of them.

Dorothy: Oh, Officers, can’t you give us a break.

Hutch: Well, maybe this one time. But, you know Jim, you ought to throw her around, beat her up once in a while.

Jim: Well, I’m going on duty now but I’ll get right on it just as soon as I get home.

Fair Bail Bonds: Night

(A man parks outside the small house and knocks on the door. It’s answered by a big man. A lady sits behind a desk)

Bo: You’re late.

Lola: Hello, Jerry. Nice to have you back in town. (Jerry places a paper bag on her desk)

Jerry: There’s 26’000 there. (He looks at a wanted poster of himself)

Lola: Let’s see. (Empties the money on her desk) And the rest, of course, you’ll…you’ll have by next week?

Jerry: I’m afraid n-not.

Bo: Thought you said you had the jobs lined up and fences to take care of the merchandise.

Jerry: Oh, they’re all s-et, but there’s been a change in plans.

Lola: Jerry, you can’t afford a change in plans. The bail bonds we have out on you go into forfeiture next week, so I’m afraid that you’re going to have to come up with a lot more cash than you brought here tonight.

Jerry: It’s over Mrs. Turkel. You’ve bled me long enough.

Lola: Bo, take him. (Jerry pulls out a gun)

Jerry: Don’t be stupid.

Lola: Look, we’ve got $65’000 worth of paper out on you.

Jerry: Well, you’re just gonna have to…eat it, lady. I’ve paid you almost twice that much now and I’m tired of running. My girls waiting for me to call her right now. We’re all packed. We’ve got a chance to get out of the…country, start all over. I’m taking that chance. Look at it this way, you don’t have a choice. You turn me into the…police now and I tell them everything about the way you really run this bail bond office. Now, get out of my way.

(Bo slowly steps aside, while Lola takes a gun out of the top drawer. Just as Jerry approaches the door she shoots him. Bo takes the gun and checks his pulse)

Bo: He’s dead. (Turkel picks up the phone) Wait a minute, what do you think you’re doing?

Lola: I’m getting us off the hook, I’m calling the police. We have just killed a dangerous, wanted felon.

Bo: We gotta think about this thing first.

Lola: What’s to think about, he’s worth $65’000 in bonds.

Bo: Lola, he said was leaving town with his girlfriend.

Lola: Yeah, well. And that probably means that she knows that he came to see me and why.

Bo: I’d say that’s a pretty good chance. If he gets found dead now she’s liable to go straight to the police.

Lola: Well, the answers very simple, isn’t it?

Bo: What do you mean?

Lola: The Street knows Konig hit town to make some scores. Now all we have to do is keep him alive long enough to get to his girlfriend and make sure there’s no connection to us.

Bo: Yeah, yeah.

The Torino: Night

Starsky: You know, there really oughta to be law that people can only commit crimes during the day light hours.

Hutch: Well, we’d only end up busting them at night anyway for breaking it.

Dispatch: All units, all units. Silent alarm. Zane’s Wholesale jewelers. East main and Flatbush.

Hutch: Zebra Three, we’re on our way. (Puts the mars light on the roof)

Zane’s Wholesale Jewelers: Night

(Inside someone sets fire to some paper near the trash can. The whole place catches fire just as a police car comes down the alley. A man flees from the building)

Jim: Police Officers! Freeze! (The man shoots the cop and takes off down a side alley just as the Torino arrives. Starsky and Hutch pursue him, but he’s gone when Starsky reaches the end of the alley)

Hutch: Which way did he go?

Starsky: I don’t know.

Hutch: Well, you got here first.

Starsky: No, I got here second. And you…

Hutch: Yeah, I know. I got the bronze medal. (They head back to the scene where a police officer is tending to his wounded partner. A crowd has gathered)

Starsky: Okay, folks, break it up, come on. You’ve seen enough.

Hutch: It’s Jim. Folks, step back. There’s nothing to see here. Come on, step back. Go on, go on. Go on home, go on. (The crowd walk away)

Starsky: Okay, Jim you’re gonna be all right.

The Hospital: Night

(The paramedics wheel Jim in, with Starsky and Hutch behind them. Dorothy runs up to Starsky)

Dorothy: Where is he? Where did they take him? I’ve got to see him.

Starsky: He’s gonna be…

Dorothy: Will you please tell me where they took him.

Starsky: Dorothy, he’s gonna be fine, I promise you. Just fine. (To a woman behind them) Look, why don’t you take her down to intensive care, okay. Go ahead, he’s gonna be okay. (Dorothy’s taken away. Hutch stands by his partner and Dobey exits the elevator)

Dobey: How’s Nedloe?

Hutch: Touch-and-go. He’s in operating.

Dobey: Another police officer hit. What’s the point? Sometimes I wonder what the hells the point of any of us putting on a badge.

Hutch: You’re starting to sound like us, cap. What’s the standard line “Cops shot everyday, comes with the territory.”

Dobey: Yeah, they’re shot everyday and usually with some turkey with 15 priors that the courts cut loose on the streets.

Starsky: You got a name or are you just making a speech?

Dobey: Try a torch you and Hutch put away three different times and three different times made bail and then skipped.

Hutch: Jerry Konig. (Takes the file)

Dobey: Arson squad say this one’s got his name written all over it.

Starsky: Good old Jerry. Why didn’t his mother ever teach him not to play with matches?

Hutch: Well, he must’ve been pretty desperate to come back here.

Dobey: I don’t care how desperate he is. (Quieter) I want you two to nail him. You got any idea where you’re going to start?

Starsky: Same place as usual, his girlfriend, Denise Gerard. She’s always trying to reform him anyhow.

Dobey: Get on it. (They leave)

Jungle Club: Night

(Denise is up on stage dancing in a leopard skin bikini while another woman in a light cat suit dances in a cage. The music ends and Denise leaves the stage to applause and whistles.)

Dancer: Hi, Denise how’re the animals tonight?

Denise: Try hungry.

Dancer: Mandy says there’s a phone call for you.

Denise: Thanks.

Dancer: Okay. (She gets up on stage to dance while Denise goes to the bar and picks up the phone) Hello?

Bo: (Trying to imitate Jerry) Hello, b-baby.

Denise: Jerry.

Bo: It’s me baby.

Denise: You sound so funny, I can hardly hear you.

Bo: There’s been a change in plans. Meet me at your place, right away.

Denise: I’ll be right there. (She hangs up, so does Bo, but he rings the bail bond office. Lola answers)

Lola: Yes?

Bo: She’s on her way.

Lola: Are you sure she thought you were Konig?

Bo: Are you kidding? She bought the story hook, line and sinker. I’ll take care of it, don’t you worry. Then I’ll meet you back at the office. (They both hang up)

(Back at the club Denise leaves and gets into a cab. It leaves just as the Torino pulls up. Starsky and Hutch enter the club, the dancer on stage winks at them and Starsky watches a different girl dance in the cage. Hutch pulls him away. Starsky goes to the bar while Hutch mills around. Having a thing for blondes he gets distracted by the dancer on stage. Starsky comes back, but gets distracted himself and trips into someone)

Starsky: Excuse me. (He goes back to Hutch) Denise isn’t here. Let’s go to her apartment. (Hutch is captivated by the dancer.) The bartender said that she split right after she got a call from someone who stutters. (Hutch is still mesmerized) Konig stutters. (Starsky blows in his ear and finally gets his attention. They leave with Hutch wiping his ear)

Denise’s Apartment: Night

(Denise climbs the stairs to her apartment while Bo gets ready by the door. The moment she gets in Bo jumps her and they struggle. The Torino arrives and Starsky and Hutch hear her screams. They run to the apartment and Hutch jumps on Bo. They wrestle until hutch knocks him over the sofa. The lights come on and Starsky runs in. They throw Bo into the closet.)

Hutch: What are you doing here? (They throw him against the sofa)

Bo: Me? I’m doing the same thing you are. Looking for Jerry Konig.

Hutch: That’s a step up in class for you isn’t it, Rile. Usually you’re beating up on someone who’s late on his alimony payments.

Denise: Oh, terrific. You guys know each other. What’s he, another cop?

Starsky: Not hardly. Rile’s a modern day bounty hunter. He makes his living finding people like your boyfriend who’ve jumped bail.

Bo: You know, one of these days hotshot, you and me are gonna go bump in the dark.

Starsky: Whenever you’d like. Meanwhile, we’d like to know how you know Jerry Konig’s back in town.

Bo: I’ve got my sources. Some of them a lot better than yours, maybe.

Denise: You expected to find Jerry here.

Bo: A girlfriend’s apartment’s a pretty good place to start, don’t you think.

Starsky: You wanna proffer charges against him for breaking and entering?

Bo: Proffer charges against me? If anyone goes in, she oughta to go in. I mean Konig ain’t here right now, but there’s sure a lot of evidence that says he was.

Starsky: It’s up to you.

Denise: Just get him out of here.

Starsky: You heard the lady, bounce. Go on. Get out of here. (Bo leaves and Denise sits down to light a cigarette.) You okay. (Takes her lighter)

Denise: I don’t know yet.

Starsky: You’ve seen, Jerry, haven’t you? (Light it out of her reach)

Denise: I don’t suppose you’d believe me if I told you I didn’t even know he was back in town.

Hutch: Denise, Jerry shot a cop tonight.

Denise: Oh, my god, no! Oh, but he told me…

Hutch: He told you what? That this was it. That he would reform, that he would go on the straight and narrow.

Denise: People can change.

Hutch: Sure people can change. It guess it just depends on how much they want to.

Denise: Oh, but he promised me. He said he just had some business to take care of.

Starsky: Look, Denise, unless you want to see him dead, the best way that you can help him is to help us find him.

Denise: Well, he said we were gonna go away together. Oh, I should have known something was wrong when he phoned. He sounded so strange. He said to meet him here.

Hutch: How long ago was that?

Denise: Fifteen minutes ago.

Hutch: Denise we need your help.

Denise: Well, you could look for a man named Monty Voorhees. They were in jail together. I think Jerry had been seeing him. (They leave)

A Street: Night

(Hutch is talking to a guy in a car. They finish talking and he gets in the Torino.)

Hutch: There’s another car round back. If Konig shows again, we’ve got him. (Takes Starsky’s apple while Starsky starts up the car. Bo watches them drive off before starting up his car.)

Fair Bail Bonds: Night

(Bo parks outside and goes inside, where Lola is looking through some pieces of paper)

Bo: You wanna hear something funny.

Lola: I can hardly wait.

Bo: We can’t get at the girl. The police got her place staked out waiting for Konig to show. (Comes up behind her and places his hands on her shoulders.) And I got a feeling we’re gonna be very sorry we started this thing. (She moves round her desk)

Lola: What choice did we have, birdbrain. At least this way everybody thinks Konig is still alive. Most importantly, his girlfriend and as long as she believes that she will keep her mouth shut.

Bo: So, what you’re saying is we gotta keep up this game until we can get to her.

Lola: That’s right, genius. Now, you better get over to that hotel that Konig was living

Bo: Why?

Lola: Because it won’t take long for the cops to track down where he was staying. And when they do you had better be ready for them. You dig? (Bo leaves)

The Jungle Club: Day

(Starsky and Hutch enter the club again and spot Huggy sitting at a table. They head up to him)

Starsky: Nice place to pass the afternoon, Hug.

Dancer: Hi, again.

Hutch: Hi, yourself.

Dancer: I hear you two guys are cops.

Starsky: You planning on starting a crime wave?

Dancer: That depends on what kind of bust you have in mind. (She goes back to the stage)

Hutch: It’s technique, Starsk, all technique. (They sit down) Hi, Hug. Hear you got something for us.

Huggy: Done some checking on that guy, Monty Voorhees you were asking about last night. (Hutch is distracted by the dancer)

Starsky: And?

Huggy: And the word is that Monty Voorhees and Konig are supposed to be really tight and this guy Voorhees is supposed to be a real strange bird. Used to be a geek. (Hutch laughs)

Starsky: A geek? Really? (Huggy nods and Hutch laughs) Do you know what a geek is?

Hutch: No.

Huggy: A geek is a freak in a circus sideshow. They throw them in a pit and they throw snakes and chicken heads at them and he runs around like crazy and gobbles them up.

Hutch: Sounds like your kind of people.

Starsky: I’ll have you know that in 1932 the geeks formed their own union.

Hutch: Oh, did you get that from the same book that you got all that other wonderful information about the crocodiles and whatever.

Starsky: Yeah.

Huggy: Hey, I read that same book.

Starsky: No kidding.

Huggy: Yeah. You read the part about the guy from Akron Ohio who shot the head off a bumblebee in flight?

Starsky: Really?

Huggy: Yeah.

Starsky: What part was that in?

Huggy: You know the part in the back near chapter 83 about the Bigfoot who’s supposed to be a creature from outer space left here to spy on us.

Starsky: Right.

Hutch: I thought everybody knew that. Huggy, Monty the Greek….uh geek.

Huggy: Last I heard he’s supposed to be working behind a switchboard at a hotel on…uh, Ninth and Tremaine.

Starsky: Thank you, Hug. (They stand to leave)

Hutch: Geeks formed their own union.

Starsky: Yeah.

Hutch: That one you made up.

Starsky: Well, suppose all they paid you in was chicken heads. (They leave the woman to dance in their cages.)

The Hotel: Day

(The Torino parks outside and they get out)

Starsky: Did you know that in Africa there was a politician who was campaigning for office and his constitutes ate him. (They head up to the hotel)

Hutch: Oh come on.

Starsky: No, it’s true.

Hutch: Well, there’s no accounting for taste is there.

Starsky: Oh, get in there. (They enter the hotel were Monty Voorhees is sat behind the desk reading a werewolf comic) That’s what I like a man that’s always broadening his mind. (He rings the bell and Monty jumps out of his seat to run, but Hutch grabs him)

Hutch: Where are you going , Monty?

Monty: You guys ain’t got nothing on me.

Starsky: Hey, Monty, phone’s ringing. (He turns to the switchboard while Starsky notices the peanut shells) You got a feeling an elephant lives here.

Monty: Palm Crest Hotel. (Connects the line and turns back to Starsky and Hutch)

Starsky: Monty, we’re looking for a friend of yours. His name’s Jerry Konig.

Monty: I ain’t seen Jerry for months. (Hutch blows shells of the register) You got no right going through that register.

Hutch: You got something to hide Monty.

Starsky: No stray chicken heads.

Hutch: Look here. Two new customers last night. Rooms 18 and 29.

Starsky: Oh, I got 29. (Monty speaks into the phone)

Monty: Jerry, it’s the cops.

Starsky: You little weasel. (Starsky pins him to the wall) Now, where’s your back door, huh?

Monty: Out there. (Points down the corridor)

Starsky: Good. (They head that way. Bo comes out of the door, fires and them and runs. There’s a buzzing sound) What’s that?

Hutch: It’s time for my vitamins.

Starsky: Oh, that’s terrific. I’d hate like hell to be blown away and not have you at your peak. (They run to the back door and out to the road, but they’ve lost him)

Starsky: Well, which way did he go?

Hutch: Nobody likes a wise guy, Starsky.

Palm Crest Hotel: Day

(A little later on police cars surround the front of the hotel while Hutch is talking to Monty)

Monty: What was I supposed to do? He said he’d kill me if I didn’t help him, if I didn’t warn him about the cops.

Hutch: Monty, you’ve spent too much time in the monkey cages. You know if you hadn’t warned him he’d be in jail now.

Monty: Yeah, and on the streets in two hours. Just like the last time and the time before that.

Hutch: It doesn’t matter to you, does it? The man’s a psychopath. That he gets his kicks out of hurting people and setting buildings on fire.

Monty: Sure it matters. It matters that they don’t do any of those things to me.

Hutch: Yeah. (Hutch meets Starsky down the hallway) What you got?

Starsky: Konig’s haul from last night’s jewelry robbery. (Hutch whistles) Anything from him?

Hutch: No, just a discourse in jungle law.

Starsky: Take him in?

Hutch: Let’s make him work a little bit first.

Starsky: Good idea, Ollie. (They go back to Monty.)

Hutch: Hey, Monty, come here. Sit down, sit down. (He sits down and Hutch pulls the cables from the switchboard) I’m only gonna say this one time, Monty, so I want you to listen good. Jerry Konig shot a cop last night. If he dies, you’re going down for accessory. He robbed a building and set fire to it and then today he attempted to kill me and my partner.

Starsky: Accessory, accessory, accessory.

Hutch: If we ever find out that Jerry Konig contacted you and you don’t contact us. (Swipes a finger across his throat)

Starsky: Property. (Throws the jewelry to an officer and they exit the building) Well, where do we go from here?

Hutch: Well, if Konig did steal the diamonds he’d have to unload them somewhere wouldn’t he.

Starsky: Good point. Next question is who’d be dumb enough to fence someone as hot as Konig.

Hutch: Why don’t you check your book?

Starsky: I knew you were gonna say that. Got any other brilliant suggestions?

Hutch: Yeah, how about the Red Baron? He’s dumb enough isn’t he?

Starsky: He ain’t the only one.

Hutch: What?

Starsky: Nothing. Hey, you know the real Red Baron…

Hutch: Oh, knock it off, will ya? (He gets in the car)

Starsky: Well, anyway, the real Red Baron when he used to go up he took a parakeet with him. He was very superstitious. (Gets in the car) Course, you wouldn’t be interested in things like that.

Hutch: Why?

Starsky: You, who know everything what with your juice, and your bananas, your grapefruit and your peas. (Drives off)

Hollywood Used Clothing: Day

(Starsky’s looking at a jacket)

Starsky: Early 1940’s.

Hutch: Yeah, how do you know that?

Starsky: Well, it’s the same kind of suit that George Brent wore in all those Betty Davis movies.

Hutch: Better be careful, it might crumble. Wouldn’t want to get grey flannel flakes all over the floor would you? (A little man with a moustache comes over)

Herman: Hey, Starsky, Hutch. What can I do for you, I hope?

Hutch: Well, let’s make it easy on you. Jerry Konig lifted about $10’000 worth of industrial diamonds last night, which means he must have been looking for a market, Herman.

Herman: Wait a minute. You’re assuming I do something illegal here. I sell clothes.

Starsky; Konig killed a cop. You ready for a going out of business sale?

Herman: Konig called, stuttering and stammering more than his usual. (Starsky checks the jacket out in the mirror) You know how he sounds. Said he needed to raise a lot of money.

Hutch: What did you tell him?

Herman: Are you ready for this? I told him to try the arson-burglar credit union.

Hutch: I wasn’t ready for that.

Herman: Konig’s a crazy. I don’t need his type of action. (Starsky hangs up the jacket on the mirror, but it opens up to reveal a cupboard with goods inside.)

Starsky: Uh, oh.

Herman: Well, what do you know about that?

Hutch: Guess, I better call in, huh?

Herman: Wait, maybe we can make a deal.

Starsky: A deal? Herman, that’s stolen merchandise.

Herman: Stolen? Who says it’s stolen? Maybe it’s just lost. I mean, you just found it, it must have been lost. I could turn it in to lost and found.

Hutch: Herman, you’re gonna take a fall.

Herman: Yeah?

Hutch: Yeah.

Herman: Well, maybe it doesn’t have to be a hard one.

Hutch: Well, that depends on what you got.

Herman: The real reason Jerry Konig came back to town.

Starsky: Okay, Herman, spill it.

Fair Bail Bonds: Day.

(The Torino pulls up outside and Starsky and Hutch walk up to the entrance where a man is on a step ladder.)

Hutch: Hey, Eddie.

Eddie: Hi, Starchy, hi Hup.

Starsky: How many times we gotta tell you. I’m Starchy, he’s Hup.

Eddie: Well, the sun was kinda in my eyes and you guys look an awful lot alike.

Hutch: Yeah, yeah. You’re working here, huh?

Eddie: Yeah, yeah, good job too. Washing windows and sweeping out, here and a couple of other places. It sure beats the tank or those road camps.

Starsky; Keep up the good work, Eddie.

Eddie: Sure, Hup-Starpy.

Both: No, no, no, I’m…

Starsky: Forget it. (They enter. Inside, Lola is speaking to a man sat at her desk)

Lola: Look mister, either you put up or your kid stays in the slammer. You want to shop this deal, fine. Only don’t you come back here when you find out I offered you the best opportunity in town. I mean, I don’t know why I’m wasting me time with you. I don’t want to write this ticket so you make up your mind, buster, and you make it up fast. (Starsky and Hutch approach the secretary.)

Hutch: I think we want to see her.

Nancy: You fellas have an appointment?

Starsky: (Shows his badge) I bet you can make one for us.

Lola: Nancy, I’ll take care of them. You take care of Mr. Petrov here. Make sure he signs all those forms.

Nancy: I’d be happy to. (Starsky and Hutch approach the desk)

Lola: Something you wanted?

Starsky: How about your license to operate.

Lola: Is that a threat?

Starsky: You better believe it, sweetheart.

Bo: What do you two boys want?

Hutch: How about a lead to Jerry Konig?

Lola: Nancy, call our lawyer.

Hutch: Yeah, Nancy, why don’t you call the lawyer and find out what the sentence is for aiding and abetting and harbouring a fugitive. (Lola shakes her head and Nancy puts down the phone)

Starsky; Words out, Lola. It’s all over the street. Jerry Konig’s back in town and he’s trying to raise enough money to get you and this goon off his back.

Lola: I don’t know what you’re talking about.

Starsky: I’m talking about a $65’000 bond. A bond that you forfeit payment on in a couple of days if Jerry Konig doesn’t appear in court.

Lola: I am a reputable business person.

Hutch: Reputable. You don’t even know what the hell the word means.

Bo: I think it’s about time you two boys left.

Starsky: Sit down, ugly.

Bo: Come on. (Bo grabs Hutch’s arm, but Hutch grabs his arm and bends him over the desk)

Hutch: My partner and I are gonna leave when we want to leave, you understand. Do you understand?

Bo: Yes.

Hutch: There is a cop in intensive care because you put Jerry Konig back on the streets. If we even get a whisper that you helped him or made a deal with him under the table to pay off his bail, we’re gonna put you away, lady. (He dumps Bo on to a chair) You coming?

Starsky: Yeah. (Hutch leaves) Oh, you’ll have to excuse my partner. He gets a little emotional sometimes. You oughta see him when he gets angry. Then again maybe you better not. Maybe, you’d better just do as he says. (Leaves. Hutch is waiting when he gets out.) Hey, do you have any idea how beautiful your eyes become when you are angry. (They get in the Torino and drive away.)

(Meanwhile, back inside)

Lola: Are you forgetting who gives the orders around here?

Bo: But they are cops.

Lola: I don’t care who they are. I said we can’t let them get any closer.

A building: Night

(The building is on fire. The fire department are trying to put it out when Starsky and Hutch arrive.)

Policeman: Your friend Konig again.

Starsky: Anybody inside?

Policeman: No, not now. Truck was seen pulling away just before the fire broke out.

Hutch: How long ago was that?

Policeman: 20-30 minutes.

Hutch: Anything ripped off.

Policeman: Several cartons full of electronic gear. (Starsky and Hutch walk around the police car and are approached by Bo)

Bo: Well, well, well, old Jerry Konig’s been a busy boy tonight, huh?

Hutch: You know something Rile, you keep following us around you’re gonna get a free ride downtown.

Bo: On what charge? There’s no law against watching a fire. ‘Sides you boys gonna have your hands full with Konig trying to burn the city down. You ought to be grateful that I’m here to nail him for you. (Walks off. They get in the Torino and drive off)

The Streets: Day.

Dispatch: Zebra Three, Zebra Three, see the man named Monty. He has information on fugitive Jerry Konig.

Palm Crest Hotel: Day

Monty: You guys gotta promise to protect me.

Starsky: Of course we’ll protect you, Monty. Hutch will take you in and make a pet out of you.

Hutch: What? Speak to us Monty.

Monty: Jerry called me about a half-hour ago. He said he wants me to meet him.

Starsky: Okay, where?

Monty: It’s a big construction yard, over near the docks.

Hutch: Have you got an address?

Monty: Regal Avenue. (They leave)

Regal Avenue: Day

(The Torino drives slowly across the docks, amongst some construction equipment.)

Starsky: Looks awfully lonely.

Hutch: Yep. (They get out of the car.A gun appears out the side of a crane. A shot is fired, Starsky and Hutch duck)

Starsky: You smell a setup?

Hutch: You’ve got a good nose, Starsk. (More shots fired.)

Starsky: See you around, hotshot. (He rolls over the hood of the Torino while Hutch fires a few rounds. Hutch runs for a truck and gets in the cab. He starts it up and uses the door for cover while he fires. The gun disappears. Hutch makes his away around as does Starsky. They both reach the crane and aim at each other)

Starsky: Don’t do that to me. (The search the crane, finding nothing. Starsky spots someone running away in the distance.) Hutch! (They run after him, but arrive in time to see a car pulling away.

Hutch: The geek has done it to us again, huh? (They run back to the car)

Palm Crest Hotel: Day

(The Torino skids to a halt outside and Starsky and Hutch run inside.)

Hutch: Monty. (He shoves a limp Monty against the wall and finds him dead)

Starsky: No more peanuts for him.

(Some time later Starsky and Hutch stand beside the Torino outside the hotel as the coroner deal with Monty’s body.)

Starsky: Roger and out. Thank you. (Hangs up the mike) You ready for Loony Tune times? That electronic gear that was taken at the last fire?

Hutch: Yeah.

Starsky: It was found abandoned at the city dump.

Hutch: What? That’s not too smart, is it? Why would a guy steal all that equipment just to dump it again?

Starsky: Maybe he’s getting eccentric in his old age.

Dispatch: Zebra Three, Zebra Three, come in, please. (Hutch answers the mic)

Hutch: Zebra Three, go ahead.

Dispatch: Captain Dobey requests that you meet him at the Mission Ice House.

Hutch: Mission Ice House? Oh, 10-4, on our way.

Starsky: Hey, isn’t that place closed for the past couple of years?

Hutch: Yeah, five or six at least. (They get in the car and drive off)

Mission Ice House: Day

(The Torino pulls up outside the building, Starsky and Hutch get out, Hutch eating a banana. Inside Dobey is looking over a couple of guys while they work.)

Dobey: I’ll see you guys back at the lab. (He goes over to meet Hutch and Starsky as they enter)

Hutch: Captain…who was that?

Dobey: Jerry Konig. They found him over there with a bullet in his head. Coroner says he’s been dead at least two days.

Starsky: Two days? Who the hell have we been chasing all this time?

Dobey: That’s what I’ve been wondering.

Hutch: Who found the body?

Dobey: Can’t give you any help there either. It was a fluke. Stray cat got caught in the ventilator. Fire department came to get him out, they found him there. (Leaves)

Starsky: Okay. Why would someone want to pretend that Jerry Konig is still alive?

Hutch: Well, let’s see what we got. Herman said that Konig came to town to get enough money to get Bo Rile and Lola Turkel off his back.

Starsky: And Denise told us that Konig had promised to go straight and wanted to leave the country with her.

Hutch: What if they were both right. And if they were then Bo Rile and Lola Turkel were the last to see Konig alive and Denise knew it.

Starsky: And the night we interrupted Do with Denise he was probably there to kill her. (They leave)

Denise’s House: Day

(Denise is in the kitchen when the phone rings. She answers it)

Denise: Hello?

Lola: Denise? Denise Girard?

Denise: Yes?

Lola: You don’t know me, but I’m a friend of Jerry’s and he asked me to call you.

Denise: Is he all right? Is he hurt?

Lola: Oh, no, he’s fine. He says he loves you. Jerry said to tell you that he’s ready to leave and he wants you to meet him.

Denise: Anywhere. Anywhere at all.

Fair Bail Bonds: Day

(Bo pours himself a drink while Lola just sits behind her desk, thinking.)

Bo: How long is it gonna take him?

Lola: Hoyle. (Eddie comes out of the back room)

Eddie: Yes, ma’am. I was just having a little bit of trouble, but everything’s okay now.

Lola: Well, what do you think? Nice fit, huh?

Bo: It’ll do.

Eddie: I sure do appreciate you letting me have these clothes, ma’am.

Lola: That’s perfectly all right, Hoyle. Now, I want you to go outside and wait in Mr. Riles car.

Eddie: Yes, ma’am, I’ll do that. (He leaves. Lola empties an envelope on the desk)

Lola: This is the rest of Konig’s stuff. I want you to make sure that that’s on Hoyle’s body before the fire starts. (Bo starts putting the stuff in his pockets.)

Bo: You know, I kinda get the feeling that you really enjoy this whole thing, don’t you? (He leaves)

Denise’s House: Day.

(Hutch is talking to some neighbour’s as Starsky approaches from behind)

Starsky: Hutch.

Hutch: Thanks, lady.

Starsky: She borrowed her neighbour’s car and left about 10 minutes ago.

Hutch: Any idea where she was going.

Starsky: That’s the bad part. Told her neighbour she was going to meet her boyfriend.

A building: Day

(Eddie enters a room with Bo behind him.)

Eddie: What do we do here, Mr. Rile? (Bo hits him over the head and stuffs Konig’s stuff in Eddie’s pockets.

(Outside Denise’s car pulls up. She sits and waits.)

Fair Bail Bonds: Day.

(Starsky and Hutch enter the building.)

Lola: I’m busy. What do you two want now?

Hutch: Denise Girard. (Starsky starts searching through her filing cabinets.)

Lola: Nancy, take these over to the courthouse will you?

Nancy: Yes, Miss Turkel. (She leaves)

Lola: I’m afraid I don’t know what you’re talking about.

Hutch: Conspiracy to murder one. Is that clear enough?

Starsky: How much will it take to spring you Lola?

Lola: I didn’t…Whatever Bo Rile did, I’m…If that’s who you’re talking about. Accomplice to what? He didn’t murder anybody. Is this a frame? Are you two guys trying to railroad that man?

Starsky: This his desk?

Lola: You know it is, why?

Starsky: I don’t know. I thought we might be able to find the gun that killed Jerry Konig.

Hutch: We found his body down at the Mission Ice House. That’s where you left it, isn’t it, Lola?

Lola: Are you making a charge?

Hutch: It’s all over. We’ve got enough to get a warrant to seize your books. And when we do I got a feeling we’ll find “extortion” and “conspiracy” in capital letters.

Starsky: That’s not to mention Jerry Konig’s murder and Monty Voorhee’s murder and all those fires. We want the girl, Lola. We want Denise Girard.

Lola: Well, I still don’t know what you’re talking about. Unless of course, my saving her life might have some influence with the courts.

Hutch: Some kind of reputable businessperson, huh?

Lola: You better believe it, buster. Riles got her. Now, you deal or she’s as good as fried to a crisp.

Starsky: All right, sweetheart, that’s the way you want it, we’ll talk to the judge.

Hutch: Sure.

Starsky: We’ll tell him how you tried to hold that girl’s life over our heads. Lola, I don’t think that you’d want the deal we’ll make for you. (They head for the door.)

Lola: Paint factory. Corner of Marshall and Chandler.

Paint Factory: Day

(Denise is still sat outside in the car.)

Bo: Hello, b-baby, sure glad you could make it. (Denise sees Bo standing by the car. He opens the door and grabs her arm.)

The Streets: Day

(The Torino screeches round a corner with the lights flashing)

Paint Factory: Day

(Eddie is still unconscious on the floor and Denise is tidied to a post. Outside the Torino pulls up. Starsky and Hutch get out and enter the building.)

Denise: Please let me go. Please. Where’s Jerry? What’d you do with him?

Bo: You ain’t figured this out yet, have you, honey? (He’s holding a petrol can,) Jerry’s dead.

Hutch: Rile, hold it.

(Bo ducks behind a post. He fires at Starsky who rolls and runs after him. Bo reaches some stairs and Starsky jumps out of a pile of paint cans and they fall down the stairs. They wrestle for a bit, paint going over them both. Bo breaks away and tries to run, but Hutch tackles him to the ground. They struggle for the upper hand until Hutch knocks him into a cabinet of paint cans and pins him to the ground. Starsky joins him with paint down his right side. Eddie stumbles to the railing and looks down at them handcuffing Bo.)

Eddie: Oh, hi there, Starpy. What are you doing here?

Hutch: Oh I thought I’d drop by and help out Hup here.

Starsky: You ever think about taking up finger painting Eddie?

Hutch’s House: Night.

Starsky: But you promised me steak and potatoes. (Looks are his healthy plate of lettuce and other nutritional stuff.) You knew I was starving. (Hutch is just staring at Abby while she prepares something) I mean, what kind of dinner is this to invite me to?

Hutch: Hey.

Starsky: Pineapple yoghurt, raisins, sunflower seeds?

Hutch: Starsky, don’t hurt her feelings, huh?

Starsky: What about my stomach? Where’d she get this recipe? From the guy who runs the parrot cages at the zoo?

Abby: Dessert’s almost ready.

Starsky: What’s in it?

Hutch: Everything.

Abby: Well, the goat’s milk, all our vitamins.

Hutch: Oh, don’t forget the desiccated liver and sea kelp.

Abby: Good idea.

Hutch: Remember what that did for you last time?

Starsky: Oh, yeah. Well, there’s always ground-up unicorn toes or it that’s unavailable why not throw in the ever-popular South American hoot owl’s beak. Let’s face it Hutch. The two of you are a little strange.

Hutch: Starsk, Abigail and I aren’t going to be eating for the next 48 hours.

Starsky: That’s what I said.

Hutch: No, Abigail feels that it’s important that we go into this period of fast loaded with nutrition, so we can maintain our normal physical potential.

Starsky: Oh, I see. You mean, you have to eat this in order to… (clenches fist)

Hutch: Starsk.

Starsky: What?

Hutch: Abby? You didn’t forget the vitamin E, did you?

Abby: Oh, we didn’t forget that. (Approaches the table with three glasses.) A triple dose. (They take their cups and Starsky smells his and grimaces. Hutch drinks his down as does Abby) You aren’t having dessert?

Starsky: Well, um…

Hutch: Starsky? (Clenches his fist)

Starsky: What, before I go to work?

Hutch: Can I have yours?

Starsky: Sure. Just stay where I can keep an eye on you.

_________________________

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