The Deadly Impostor

transcript by Sarah Spearey

 

 

 

The Squad Room: Day

 

(StarskyÕs sitting behind his desk, working on a typewriter with an old lady sat opposite.)

 

Starsky: Okay, Mrs. McMillan, just what kind of a car was it that you had stolen?

 

Mrs. McMillan: It was a 1952 Keiser Frazer.

 

Starsky: (Types) Keiser Frazer.

 

Mrs. McMillan: My late husband gave it to me. Brand new.

 

Starsky: Oh.

 

Mrs. McMillan: For our 25th Wedding anniversary. ŌMaggie,Ķ he said. ŌThese Keiser FrazerÕs are going to be the coming thingĶ

 

Starsky: Oh, sounds like the guy who sold my mother her Studebaker.

 

Mrs. McMillan: Oh no, Felix was a history teacher. 42 years. (Phone rings) Central High School. He never sold cars. (Hutch answers the phone)

 

Hutch: Hutchinson.

 

Vinnie: Hey, Ken, this is Vinnie.

 

Hutch: Yeah, Vinnie?

 

Vinnie: You remember that guy you and Starsk went to the academy with?

 

Hutch: Which one?

 

Vinnie: The one that quit and joined the Air Force. Yeah, John Colby. (At the gym, John is fighting an opponent on a mat)

 

Hutch: John Colby?

 

Vinnie: Yeah, I thought youÕd like to know heÕs in here working out.

 

Hutch: Well, put him on, let me talk to him. (JohnÕs too busy fighting)

 

Vinnie: Right now he seems to be pretty bust wailing the tar out of Tito.

 

Hutch: Well, you tell him to hold on for about 20 minutes. WeÕll be down there as soon as we get off duty. DonÕt let him get away.

 

Vinnie: Yeah, sure thing, Ken. See you later. (Hangs up)

 

Starsky: Okay, just one more question, Mrs. McMillan.

 

Mrs. McMillan: You can call me Maggie, David.

 

Starsky: Oh, okay, Maggie. I need your phone number.

 

Mrs. McMillan: Is this routine or personal?

 

Starsky: Well, both. I need it for the report, but I thought IÕd call you up some night and we could go out boogying.

 

Mrs. McMillan: That would be nice, David. But not tonight. Tonight, I have a date.

 

Starsky: Oh, some other night, then, okay.

 

Mrs. McMillan: That would be fine. (Rips out the paper)

 

Starsky: Thank you, Maggie.

 

Mrs. McMillan: Oh, youÕre welcome, David. (Starsky stands up)

 

Starsky: Let me give you a hand.

 

Mrs. McMillan: Oh, thank you.

 

Starsky: You know how to get out of here. You go down the corridor, take the elevator. (She reaches the door just as Dobey enters. He lets her pass and shuts the door)

 

Dobey: What was she doing here?

 

Starsky: Oh, well, someone stole her 1952 green and black Keiser Frazer and sheÕs convinced that it was a ring of professional car thieves. So I told her weÕd alert the border patrol.

 

Dobey: You know she was in Vice last week.

 

Starsky: Yeah?

 

Dobey: Claiming she was kidnapped and held prisoner by a motorcycle gang. And a week before she was in the DAÕs officeÉ

 

Starsky: Yeah?

 

Dobey: Confessing to the stalking murders.

 

Starsky: Yeah and two months ago she confessed to Hutch for setting the downtown fires. Hey, sheÕs a nice old lady, we had a couple of minutes, so what does it hurt?

 

Hutch: Hey, how did it go with you down at the Federal Prosecutors office on the Garvin case? 

 

Dobey: DonÕt ask. (Sits down) They claim come Monday theyÕre gonna hit the grand jury with a secret witness that will nail Garvin to the wall. In the meantime, who he is and where he is, is being kept a secret from us menial city police.

 

Starsky: Yeah, well, look at it this way captain. If the cites and the state departments got along with the Feds and visa versa then the crime rate probably wouldnÕt go up every year and you know where that would leave us.

 

Dobey: Where?

 

Starsky: Out of work.

 

Dobey: Get out of here. (Heads for the door where Hutch is putting on his jacket)

 

Starsky: Care for a ride in my Frazer Keiser?

 

Hutch: Why not?

 

Starsky How about my Keiser Frazer?

 

Hutch: John Colby called.

 

Starsky: Really? John Colby? WhereÕs he? (They leave)

 

 

VinnieÕs Gym: Day

 

(Starsky and Hutch creep into the changing room and peer around a post)

 

Starsky: (Whispers) HeÕs in the shower.

 

Hutch: (Whispers) In the shower.

 

(Starsky picks up JohnÕs shoes while Hutch hits his head on the payphone. They bang loudly on the lockers and yell unintelligible words. When John comes out they go quiet. HeÕs wearing only a towel with a toothbrush in his mouth. He walks around, but canÕt see anyone. He goes over to his clothes and Hutch sits up in the laundry basket with ColbyÕs hat on and holding his shoes)

 

Hutch: Herr Luetant, you are out of uniform. (Salutes with a shoe)

 

Colby: Hutch! All right, whereÕs the other one. (Starsky pops his head out of a locker with ColbyÕs jacket on a hanger) Starsky! (They approach him)

 

Starsky: (Sings) ŌOff we go into the wild blue yonder.Ķ   

 

Hutch: Herr Luetant you are still out of uniform.

 

Colby: And you are still out of your mind.

 

Starsky: And IÕm running out of patience with both of you. (Shakes his hand)

How are you kid?

 

Colby: Okay. (Starsky takes his towel) Starsky. Starsky, give me the towel.

 

Hutch: Sergeant.

 

Starsky: Yes.

 

Hutch: The Lieutenant wants his towel back.

 

Starsky: Okay.

 

Hutch: Give it to him.

 

Colby: YouÕre still out of your mind. (Starsky snaps the towel at him. Colby runs) Come on, Starsky. (Starsky chases him, snapping the towel, Colby tries to keep his distance. Hutch comes up behind him, making him fall into the laundry basket.)

 

Starsky: Oh, look at you, you look terrific. Hey, you bimbo.

 

Hutch: Hey, you bum, how are you? (Shakes his hand)

 

Colby: Hey, Hutch, Starsky, you donÕt how good it is to see you guys.

 

(Some time later John is dressed, putting on his shoes. The mood is less jovial)

 

Starsky: Five years.  Five years in a prisoner-of-war camp.

 

Colby: Then two years in another hospital in Hawaii trying to get my leg back in shape. Chasing away the Boogieman.

 

Hutch: What is it John?

 

Colby: Nothing.

 

Starsky: Hey, dumbo, we were called the Three MusketeersÉno, hey, what were we called at the academy? The three corksÉ

 

Hutch: Corsicans.

 

Starsky: The Corsicans. The three corkÉThe Corsicans Brothers, right?

 

Hutch: You remember that?

 

Colby: Yeah.

 

Starsky: Are you trying to tell us thereÕs nothing bothering you?

 

Colby: Well, okay, the real reason IÕm in town is to look up my ex-wife and kid. Only IÕm having a little bit of trouble finding them, thatÕs all.

 

Starsky: Hey, I didnÕt know you were married.

 

Colby: Oh, it was a quick thing. You know, a two week romance, a three year marriage. I canÕt blame her for divorcing me. When I was in that prison camp I guess everybody back here thought I was dead.

 

Hutch: When are you leaving for Germany?

 

Colby: Monday.

 

Hutch: You want us to help you find her?

 

Colby: No, itÕs okay. IÕm going to see a guy this afternoon at a place where she and the kid lived under her maiden name.

 

Hutch: Well, look if you change your mind. You can find us at my place.

 

Colby: Okay.

 

Hutch: Hey!

 

Starsky: Hey!

 

Hutch: WeÕve got a party tonight. How about a party? You wanna come to a party?

 

Starsky: Ah, come on, man. Look, hey, weÕre gonna get you something real swell, you know. About like that and that and a little of that.

 

Colby: Look, IÕll have to think about it, okay.

 

Starsky: Okay. (Places the hat on ColbyÕs head) Lieutenant (They salute each other)

 

Colby: WeÕll see you.

 

Starsky: Yeah. Take care. (Colby leaves)

 

Hutch: HeÕs hurting.

 

Starsky: Ah huh. (They leave)

 

 

HutchÕs House: Night

 

(ThereÕs a party, with music and people dancing. A lady in a bright pink dress is handing out snacks.)

 

Fifi: Cracker? (She goes over to where Hutch is sat on his bed, cuddling a pretty blonde)

 

Hutch: You might ask yourself, can I really tell your future with these cards?

 

Fifi: Kenneth?

 

Hutch: Not now, Fifi. Trust me. Believe me and your future will be ensured.

 

Fifi: Kenneth?

 

Hutch: What is it, Fifi?

 

Fifi: Do you want me to hang around later and help you clean up?

 

Hutch: Much later.

 

Fifi: Oh. (Leaves them and continues handing out snacks and winds up at the couch where Starsky is lounging with a woman. She takes some snacks and so does he. They feed each other. She walks up to another guy) Cracker? (The door bell rings) IÕll get it. (She screams when she sees Colby at the door with blood on his face. Starsky helps Colby over to a chair)

 

Hutch: Oh, shut up, Fifi. (They switch, Starsky deals with Fifi)

 

Starsky: Fifi, IÕm gonna bust you in the mouth if you donÕt shut up. Okay, now you go in there and get a cold towel. Okay, go ahead. (Pushes her in the bathroom. Hutch is examining the wound on JohnÕs head)

 

Hutch: What happened, John?

 

Colby: Went to that place where my ex-wife lived.  Karen? (Fifi hands Hutch a towel, he places it over the cut)

 

Hutch: Yeah.

 

Colby: The manager said he didnÕt know anything. I went back. They were waiting for me.

 

Starsky: WhoÕs they?

 

Colby: DonÕt know. They said. ŌForget Karen ever livedĶ (Fade)

 

 

Apartment building: Day

 

(Starsky and Hutch are waiting outside an apartment building. The manager comes out carrying a dustbin)

 

Manager: I donÕt know who busted up your friend. (He dumps the bin by the Torino)

 

Starsky: Hey, thatÕs my car.

 

Manager: And I donÕt know no dame named Colby.

 

Starsky: Now, wait a sec, she lived here under her maiden name. Now, her name was Karen Brennan.

 

Manager: I donÕt know that name either.

 

Hutch: Now, look, pal. WeÕre losing out patience with you, so what weÕre going to do is give you a choice. You either talk to us or weÕre going to send the biggest parade of city inspectors ever to march through a condemned building.

 

Manager: This building isnÕt condemned.

 

Hutch: Not yet. (He marches back in, comes back out with another dustbin)

 

Manager: Look, IÕve had three different tenants in that apartment since she moved out. (Dumps the dustbin on StarskyÕs foot)

 

Hutch: Where did she move to?

 

Manager: I donÕt know.

 

Starsky: What about her mail?

 

Manager: They told me to return it all to the local post office and mark it Ôgeneral deliveryÕ

 

Starsky: Wait a sec. WhoÕs they?

 

Manager: The guy she was going with. I think they were gonna get married.

 

Starsky: Oh, thatÕs nice. WhatÕs his name?

 

Manager: I donÕt remember. (They both stare up at his building) Karpel. Warren Karpel.

 

Hutch: Good.

 

Manager: Cops. (Starsky and Hutch get back in the car and drive off) 

 

 

The Post Office: Day

 

(Starsky is waiting outside the PO, leaning on the hood of his car. He sees a pretty woman walk by, they smile at each other and she walks right on by before he can say anything. She meets up with this bolding guy with glasses. Hutch comes out with his note book. He looks at the woman moving further down the street and whistles softly)

 

Hutch: Well, Starsky, thereÕs always Maggie McMillan. If you ever find her Keiser Frazer, maybe the two of you can take it to a drive-in movie or something.

 

Starsky: Why donÕt you put an egg in your shoe and beat it.

 

Hutch: What did the radio kick back on Karpel? (They both lean on the hood)

 

Starsky: He did 26 months for tax evasion.

 

Hutch: 26 months? ThatÕs a lot of evading.

 

Starsky: Yeah. Just what Colby needs to find out that his kidÕs being brought up by an ex-con.

 

Hutch: Yeah

 

Starsky: HowÕd you do?

 

Hutch: Well, Karen Brennan had her mail forwarded in care f Warren, G Karpel. 2850 Forreston Drive, Belmont Hills.

 

 

Belmont Hills: Day

 

(ThereÕs a for sale sign standing in an empty patch of land. Starsky and Hutch are stood in the middle)

 

Starsky: 2850, huh?

 

Hutch: ItÕs gotta be around here some place.

 

Starsky: Well, it isnÕt. Unless of course somebody came and moved it in the last five minutes.

 

Hutch: Well, wait a minutes, thatÕs that over there? (Points to his right)

 

Starsky: ItÕs a building.

 

Hutch: What number?

 

Starsky: 2848.

 

Hutch: All right, whatÕs that over there? (Points to his left)

 

Starsky: ThatÕs another building.

 

Hutch: The number!

 

Starsky: 2852

 

Hutch: All right, whatÕs this? (Points to the empty spot there stood in)

 

Starsky: This is a vacant lot, dummy. WeÕve been suckered.

 

Hutch: Do you get the feeling that somebody doesnÕt want us to find Mr and Mrs. Karpel?

 

Starsky: No kidding. (They trudge out of the vacant lot)

 

 

A Phone Booth: Day

 

(A bald man is talking on the phone)

Bald Man: Yeah, yeah, right. All right, look, total value is 2.7 million. Look, any market. All right, look, IÕll let you have it for half that. Right. Well, letÕs just say I need some fast travelling money, okay. Right. (Colby comes up to the phone booth and knocks on the glass) Hey, hold your water, IÕll be done in a second. (Back to the phone) All right. (Colby unwraps from his paper a knife and glove.) Yeah, right, look, well, I get 10 percent of the finderÕs fee. Yeah, okay, no, I canÕt- (Colby opens the door and stabs him in the back)

 

 

Huggy BearÕs: Day

 

(Huggy is talking to Colby, whoÕs sat at a table)

 

Huggy: And this guy ended up on the other side of this time warp, in a parallel dimension where all things are the same, only different. Like cops are called ÔrogasÕ (Starsky and Hutch enter)

 

Colby: Speaking of rogas.

 

Huggy: Look, donÕt pay no attention to them.  And this guy has a pet called a ÔparfelÕ and he tries to fit in by saying  heÕs been away for a while. (Starsky and Hutch sit at the table) Then he falls in love, but all the girls are the same, only different. But he canÕt marry the girl because on the other side of the time warp heÕs already married.

 

Hutch: Hey, John, donÕt expect an ending to this story. Huggy only reads a page a week.

 

Huggy: Hutch, when youÕre into heavy vibes like this you donÕt boggle the mind with endings and such.

 

Starsky: Huggy, how are you fixed for food?

 

Huggy: Would you like to see the menu? Or would you like the Huggy Bear special of the week?

 

Hutch: Well, at the risk of boggling any minds, weÕll have a couple of specials. Want something to drink? Couple of beers?

 

Starsky: Lemonade.

 

Huggy: Lemonade. Got it. Fantastic. (He leaves)

 

Colby: What did you find out?

 

Hutch: Karen remarried a man by the name of Warren Karpel.

 

Colby: ThatÕs it?

 

Starsky: HeÕs an ex-con, John.

 

Hutch: And right now it appears that he doesnÕt want to be found by anybody.

 

Colby: Terrific.

 

(The phone rings, Huggy answers it.)

 

Huggy: Huggy BearÕs. Yeah. Hey, Hutch. Phone. (Hutch gets up. Colby looks unhappy)

 

Starsky: Hey, come on. WeÕre gonna find them. It might take a little time. WeÕve got the whole weekend off, so donÕt worry.

 

Colby: Hey, man, I donÕt want to mess up your free time.

 

Starsky: Call it a busmanÕs holiday.

 

Colby: You know, itÕs the kid. A man oughta have a right to see his own son.

 

Hutch: (On the phone) Yeah, all right. (Hangs up and goes back to the table) That was DobeyÕs office.

 

Starsky: What?

 

Hutch: WeÕre back on.

 

Starsky: No.

 

Hutch: Yep.

 

Starsky: CouldnÕt get us out of it?

 

Hutch: I tried. But heÕs calling all the off duties in. John, weÕre still gonna to try to find her.

 

Colby: Hey, Hutch, thereÕs no time.

 

Starsky: WeÕre gonna make time. (Stands up)

 

Hutch: YouÕre leaving Monday, right?

 

Colby: Yeah.

 

Hutch: WeÕll do the best we can.

 

Starsky: Take care.

 

Colby: Okay. (They leave Colby, but get stopped by Huggy and his tray)

 

Huggy: Hey, guys, what about your specials?

 

Starsky: Huggy, those are three regular hamburgers.

 

Hutch: And theyÕre probably cold. (They leave, and Starsky checks out a woman who enters as they leave. She sits at the bar. Colby recognises her and turns away. She spots him and goes over to him)

 

Jackie: Well, I donÕtÕ believe it, Mike Robbins.

 

Colby: Hey, Jackie, honey. What are you doing out here? (They kiss)

 

Jackie: What am I doing out here? What are you doing out here? You know, you disappeared out of Miami like a hooked bonefish.

 

Colby: I had to. Business.

 

Jackie: Business?

 

Colby: Well, I can explain, but not here.

 

Jackie: Just like old times. Here we go again. Your place or mine?

 

Colby: Well, why donÕt we go to your place and have a few drinks and talk it over.

 

Jackie: Yeah. (He leaves some money on the table)

 

 

DobeyÕs Office:

 

(Hutch is looking at a picture of the man who was murdered in the phone booth)

 

Dobey: What do you know about him? (DobeyÕs behind his desk, StarskyÕs sat beside it)

 

Hutch: Harvey Russo. HeÕs Nate GarvinÕs main man in drug importation isnÕt he?

 

Dobey: He was. About two hours ago, in broad daylight on a city street, he got himself killed. He got a knife shoved right into his spinal column. Starsky, get your feet off my desk.

 

Starsky: Hey, Russo was one of the main targets set for the grand jury for Monday.

 

Dobey: Right and now all of a sudden the feds who wouldnÕtÕ give us the time of day are screaming for our help. Now, according to them, their secret witness wouldÕve nailed both him and Garvin. We have information that a high priced hit manÕs been brought in. Speculation is, Garvin brought him in.

 

Hutch: Well, that makes sense. To eliminate anybody who could testify against him Captain, if Garvin is responsible for bringing in this knife man that key witness could be the next target on the list.

 

Dobey: Yeah, but he has to find him first.

 

 

JackieÕs Place: Day

 

(ColbyÕs on the phone to Garvin)

 

Colby: And I told you Garvin, IÕll find Karpel. Now, heÕll never get to the grand jury. (GarvinÕs sat in his office)

 

Garvin: Everything IÕve got is on the line, Colby. YouÕre taking a big chance, trying to use those cops.

 

Colby: I told you in the beginning there would be risks. Now with the amount of time youÕve given me to make these hits, itÕs the only way.

 

Garvin: Well, if theyÕre back on duty, how will you get them looking for Karpel again?

 

Colby: You let me worry about that. You do exactly as IÕve told you and weÕll have them working for me. (JackieÕs stood at the bathroom door. He hangs up)

 

Jackie: So now youÕre an undercover narcotics agent.

 

Colby: Hey, everybodyÕs gotta make a living.  (Stands up)

 

Jackie: Come on, Mike. I never believed that baloney about you being an investment counsellor.

 

Colby: I thought I was pretty convincing. (They stop at a small bar)

 

Jackie: Oh, come on, sweetie. No, youÕre much more of a killer for that line of work.  IÕd say your more like a mako shark. Smooth and sleek and damn deadly.

 

Colby: You like it better here than in Florida. (He makes himself a drink)

 

Jackie: Well, Miami got to be a kind of personal drag. Well, after you disappeared the boss and his whole family got wiped out in a freak accident. Then the business went down the tubes. Well, it was bought out by a big conglomerate, so, I quit. A commercial artist can get a job anywhere. (pause) I checked New York, you know.

 

Colby: New York?

 

Jackie: The brokerage firm you said you worked for. They never heard of you, Michael.

 

Colby: Well, thatÕs the trouble with being undercover. You canÕt even tell your best friends. (Hands her a glass and they drink)

 

Jackie: You know, one of these days, Mike Robbins, IÕm gonna find out exactly what you really do. (They kiss passionately and hug, Colby looks down at a knife)

 

Colby: Yes, IÕm sure you will.

 

 

JackieÕs Apartment: Night

 

(A photographer takes a picture of the knife on the floor, next to the stretcher with JackieÕs body covered up. Starsky and Hutch are there)

 

Hutch: Knife shoved into the spinal column. A little scary.

 

Starsky: The question is, what connection did she have to Nate Garvin? It doesnÕt make any sense.

 

Hutch: You know, Starsky, I have a feeling weÕve seen her somewhere. (They both look at a framed picture of Jackie)

 

Starsky: Well, HuggyÕs?

 

Hutch: Yeah.

 

 

Huggy BearÕs: Night

 

(A guy comes in from the back door)

 

Jaime: Hey, Hug?

 

Huggy: Hey, what you need, B.

 

Jaime: ThereÕs a guy out back asking for you.

 

Huggy: Well, why wonÕt he come in?

 

Jaime: I donÕt know. Looks a little under the weather to me. (Jaime goes back to the kitchen, while Huggy heads outside. He finds Colby leaning against the wall, holding onto the drainpipe)

 

Huggy: Hey, Lieutenant.

 

Colby: Hey, Huggy. (He sounds drunk) Hey, my old buddies walked out on me.

 

Huggy: HowÕs that?

 

Colby: Husky and Starch. (Laughs)

 

Huggy: Hey, come on, sit up. (Sits him up on a box)

 

Colby: Starsky and Hutch, Husky and Starch. Pretty good, eh? You know, I was the first one to ever call them that. My old pals. TheyÕre not gonna help me find my wife and kid for me.

 

Huggy: Come on, Lieutenant. If anybody can find your family those two guys can. (Three men enter the alley from both sides) Lieutenant, weÕd better get out of here.

 

(Two of the guys grab Huggy and start beating him up, while Colby tangles with the other guy, until Huggy is beaten unconscious. They stop and Colby points to his eye that the guy hits and they run off. Inside, Starsky and Hutch enter through the front door.)

 

Starsky: Hey, Jaime, whereÕs Huggy?

 

Jaime: HeÕs out back with your friend Colby.

 

Hutch: Colby? (They go out back and find Huggy unconscious and John groaning)

 

Starsky: What the-? (He goes over to Huggy, while Hutch goes to Colby)

 

Hutch: Hey, John.

 

Starsky: Huggy?

 

Hutch: You all right?

 

Colby: Help me up.

 

Starsky: Huggy?

 

Hutch: Come on.

 

Starsky: Huggy?

 

Hutch: ThereÕs a box right here, John. (Picks him up and settles him on the box) Take it easy.

 

Starsky: Huggy? Come here. (Lifts his head up. He starts to groan) Huggy, can you hear me? What happened?

 

Colby: ItÕs my fault, my fault. They said, ŌForget Karpel.Ķ

 

Starsky: Hey, we need an ambulance.

 

Hutch: Yeah. Take it easy, John. (He goes back in to call for one. Starsky props HuggyÕs head up with his hat, while Colby looks on with a strange smile)

 

 

Hospital: Night

 

(ColbyÕs sat, waiting with one hand bandaged. A nurse helps a man with a cane through some double doors and at the same time Starsky and Hutch enter. Colby makes a move to stand)

 

Hutch: Hold on, John. 

 

Starsky: Where are you going?

 

Colby: Hey, howÕs Huggy?

 

Hutch: WeÕll, heÕs got a couple of broken ribs, some bad bruises, a bad headache, but heÕs out of danger.

 

Starsky: HeÕll live.

 

Hutch: How are you doing? WhatÕs the report on ya?

 

Colby: A bruise, couple of cuts. You know those guys were after me. TheyÕre trying to scare me off. Now, Huggy just got in the way. All I want to do is see my son, why is Karpel doing this?

 

Starsky: ThatÕs what weÕre trying to find out.

 

Colby: But youÕre on duty.

 

Starsky: Yeah, weÕre on duty and we got a couple of leads and a guy weÕre after. Now, weÕre just waiting for something to happen.

 

Hutch: In the meantime, weÕve located a guy who might help us find your wife.

 

Colby: Can I come with you?

 

Starsky: No.

 

Hutch: HeÕs in the numbers racket, John. He doesnÕt like visitors. IÕll tell you what, why donÕt you go to my place, take a hot shower, get some rest, change your clothes. WeÕll call you later.

 

Colby: Okay.

 

Starsky: Enjoy yourself.

 

Colby: Yeah. (They leave and he smiles.)

 

 

An Apartment Building: Night

 

(A balding man is writing down things on pieces of paper. ThereÕs a knock at his door, a special one he seems to recognise.)

 

Parouch: Uh, uh, Just a minute. (He places the pieces of paper in a bucket and hides it under the table and closes his book. He answers the door)

 

Starsky: It worked. (He grabs his bin and starts burning the paper) Save it, Parouch. This is not a bust.

 

Parouch: Oh yeah? Well, how do I know that?

 

Hutch: Because if it was a bust, youÕd be up against the wall instead of making paper soufflŽ here.

 

Starsky: Come here. (Pulls back a chair. He sits.)

 

Parouch: What do you want?

 

Starsky: We are looking for a guy who used to work for your old boss, Nate Garvin. His name is Warren Karpel.

 

Parouch: Never heard of him.

 

Hutch: ThatÕs a natural reaction. (Picks up some of the pieces and burns one) I really expected more out of you, Parouch.

 

Parouch: Hey, hey, cut that out. (He burns more)  Hey! Hey! Come on, come on, cut that out. ThatÕs my livelihood. (He burns them all)

 

Hutch: You gonna listen to my partner. (He takes the bucket)

 

Parouch: No! No!

 

Hutch: No.

 

Parouch: I mean, I mean, yeah, yeah. IÕll listen, but I mean, no, no, donÕt drop.

 

Hutch: Okay. (Gives him back the bucket)

 

Starsky: Now, we want you to pass around that we are interested in anything and everything on Warren Karpel. Okay?

 

Parouch: Okay.

 

Starsky: Good.

 

Parouch: Good.

 

Hutch: Good. (They head for the door)

 

Parouch: Hey, hey, how am I gonna explain dumping half a dayÕs receipts without getting busted?

 

Starsky: Tell you what, Emile. You come up with something special and Hutch and I will come back and bust you. Okay? (Pats his head. He stops at the door and knocks in code) SOS. (Leaves)

 

 

GarvinÕs Mansion: Night

 

(Colby pours himself a drink and walks over to Garvin, whoÕs stood by his desk)

 

Colby: And that beating that Huggy Bear and I took from the fight in the alley will convince Starsky and Hutch to work twice as hard to find Karpel.

 

Garvin: Well, I still donÕt like it.

 

Colby: ItÕs not for you to like or dislike. Starsky and Hutch are my problem.

 

Garvin: Well, you better be sure that it stays your problem. If they ever connect you to my organisation and thenÉ

 

Colby: Then what, Mr. Garvin? YouÕll put a contract out on me. IÕll bet you would.

 

Garvin: You said you wanted something.

 

Colby: A photograph of Karen Karpel. (Garvin takes the picture out of his desk draw and hands it to Colby)

 

Garvin: Is there anything else?

 

Colby: Yeah, when I locate Karpel IÕll need some help with the guards. IÕll take care of Karpel myself. 

 

 

The Beach: Day

 

(A blond little boy is throwing pebbles into the sea. He runs up the beach and collects more from a man)

 

Man: ThatÕs some arm heÕs got, Mr. Karpel. (Karpel and Karen are sat further up the beach)

 

Karen: Warren, donÕt you understand?  When John was killed in Vietnam Corey and I didnÕt have anything.

 

Karpel: Well, it still doesnÕt take away from the fact that itÕs wrong to put you and Corey in this kind of danger.

 

Karen: After youÕve testified tomorrow that will all be over.

 

Karpel: I wish I could believe that. GarvinÕs a powerful man. Even inside prison he might order-

 

Karen: Once heÕs in prison heÕs just gonna be another inmate. And an old one at that.

 

Karpel: Maybe so. But just in case, if anything should happen, if he or one of his killers should ever get close-

 

Karen: I know, I know. Corey and I are most important. Do what ever I have to do to save our lives.

 

Karpel: Am I that much of a nag?

 

Karen: Worse than that.

 

Karpel: And if we have to be on the run for the rest of our lives.

 

Karen: I always did like to travel. (They kiss)

 

 

A Phone Booth: Day

 

(Starsky is parked outside the phone booth, reading a magazine. Hutch is in the phone booth, on the phone)

 

Hutch: What have you got, Parouch?

 

Parouch: The best word I could turn up is that Karpel is holed up somewhere on Turner Beach. HeÕs living out of a post office box.

 

Hutch: Turner Beach, huh? Well, you did good, Emile.

 

Parouch: Hutch.

 

Hutch: Yeah?

 

Parouch: You wonÕt forget to come and bust me.

 

Hutch: No, we wonÕt forget. (Hangs up and goes over to Starsky) Well, we got a shot.

 

Starsky: Yeah?

 

Hutch: The post office at Turner Beach. LetÕs pick up John, huh? (Takes his magazine) LetÕs go.

 

Starsky: Hey. DonÕt lose my place. (Starsky gets in while Hutch looks at the magazine and whistles. Starsky grabs it through the window. Hutch gets in)

 

 

Turner Beach: Day

 

(The Torino parks outside the post office. ColbyÕs in the back. Starsky gets out)

 

Starsky: IÕll get the address. YouÕll probably be seeing your ex-wife and kid within the hour.

 

Colby: Hey, Hutch. IÕve never shown you a picture of Karen (Takes out the picture)

 

Hutch: No. (Takes it.)

 

Colby: Taken just before I went to ÔNam.

 

Hutch: SheÕs beautiful.

 

Colby: Yeah. (A car drives up)You know something Hutch, I havenÕt evenÉGosh I havenÕt even thanked you guysÉ

 

Hutch: DonÕt mention it.

 

Colby: Éfor what youÕre doing, you know. (Looks out the window) Hutch?

 

Hutch: Yeah?

 

Colby: Hutch, thatÕsÉthatÕs her. (Points to Karen getting out of her car across the parking lot) ThatÕs Karen.

 

Hutch: Which one?

 

Colby: The girl with the package. ThatÕs Karen.

 

Hutch: Now, wait a minute, wait a minute, John. ItÕs been a long time since youÕve seen her and sheÕs gonna be surprised. Why donÕt you let me talk to her first?

 

Colby: YouÕre right, but Hutch, if sheÕll see me could you find someplace private.

 

Hutch: Private. Right.

 

Colby: You know, alone.

 

Hutch: How about that street down there by the nursery? Just inside of the nursery.

 

Colby: Okay.

 

Hutch: Okay.  (Hutch gets out and jogs across the parking lot to where Karen is closing her trunk) Karen Karpel? (She runs for the front door) Mrs. Karpel, my name is Detective Kenneth Hutchinson. (Shows his badge) And thereÕs no need to be alarmed. IÕd just like to talk to you for a moment about your former husband.

 

Karen: John?

 

Hutch: Yeah. (Colby watches as they talk and gets out of the car) So, heÕs not going to be here long, heÕs leaving in a couple of hours for another assignment in Germany. And heÕd like to see his son and talk to him. How about it?

 

Karen: Of course. I want Corey to know his real father. IÕm just stunned that heÕs alive.

 

Hutch: Yeah.

 

Karen: Where is he?

 

Hutch: HeÕs down by that nursery down there. He felt itÕd be better if the two of you met alone. (They walk together to the alley where Colby is waiting, his back to them)

John? (He turns around)

 

Karen: What kind of a sick joke is this?  IÕve never seen this man before in my life. (Colby hits Hutch in the stomach and then knocks him over the head.)

 

(Sometimes later, Starsky find Hutch unconscious on the ground.)

 

Starsky: Hutch? Hey. Hutch? Come on, snap out of it. (Hutch awakens abruptly and groans) Good morning. You feel as bad as you look?

 

Hutch: Worse.

 

Starsky: How do you know? You havenÕt seen yourself.

 

Hutch: I can feel it. Can you help me up?

 

Starsky: Yeah, come on, (Pulls Hutch up and leans him against a car.) Okay, now, what happened, huh?  WhereÕs Colby?

 

Hutch: He was here. He was here with Karen.

 

Starsky: His wife?

 

Hutch: His wife, hell, man. JohnÕs a phoney.

 

Starsky: What?

 

Hutch: SheÕd never seen him before.

 

Starsky: What are you talking about?

 

Hutch: He put me out. LetÕs go.

 

 

DobeyÕs Office: Day

 

(A man is wondering about DobeyÕs office.)

 

Buckland: Warren Karpel was Nate GarvinÕs chief accountant. WeÕve gone to a lot of trouble to hide him and his family away until the Grand Jury meets on Monday and IÕd like to know why youÕve got city detectives trying to blow their cover.

 

Dobey: Karpel? Is he you secret Grand Jury witness? Starsky and Hutch are trying to locate him for a friend of theirs whose ex-wife is married to Karpel.

 

Buckland: No, no, no. Mrs. KarpelÕs former husband never made it back from Vietnam.

 

Dobey: Excuse me, Buckland. (Picks up the phone) Get me Starsky and Hutch. You know, if you Federal Bureaucrats were less concerned with secrecy the country would be a lot better off. (Into the phone) Well, come on, get them, I gotta get to them. 

 

(Starsky and Hutch are still at Turner Beach heading back to the Torino)

 

Starsky: You ever think of opening up an escort service.

 

Hutch: Yeah.

 

Dispatch: Zebra Three from Control. Zebra Three from Control. (Starsky answers)

 

Starsky: Zebra Three, Zebra Three.

 

Dispatch: Zebra Three, switch to tac two for Captain Dobey. (Hutch sits on the hood of the Torino. Starsky puts a hand on his shoulder)

 

Dobey: Starsky or Hutch?

 

Starsky: This is Starsky, captain.

 

Dobey: Is your friend Colby there?

 

Hutch: Is Colby here? (Grunts)

 

Starsky: ColbyÕs apparently taken off with Mrs. Karpel, captain.

 

Dobey: He did what?

 

Starsky: About 20 minutes ago, knocked Hutch down and took off with Mrs. Karpel. Why, weÕre still trying to figure out.

 

Dobey: Well, I got the why. Karpel is the secret Grand Jury witness due to testify Monday morning against Nate Garvin and we think your friend Colby is the hit man imported to kill Harvey Russo and Karpel.

 

Starsky: ColbyÕs a hit man?

 

Dobey: ThatÕs what it looks like.

 

Starsky: Captain, you got an address for Mrs. Karpel.

 

Dobey: Yeah, hold on a minute. (Turns to Buckland) You have an address on Karpel.

 

Buckland: Of course.

 

Dobey: Well, come on, give it to me.

 

Buckland: Captain, Dobey, you havenÕt heard a word I-

 

Dobey: Mr. Buckland, we have every reason to suspect that a professional killerÕs on his way to KarpelÕs. Now, Starsky and Hutch might be able to stop him if they know where to go. I need that address and I need it now.

 

 

The Beach: Day.

 

(Colby and Karen are sat in KarenÕs car as another car drives up and stops. Colby gets out and Karen bursts into tears. Colby and the drive meet over the hood of the car)

 

Colby: Did you find the house? 

 

Guy: Yeah, right where she said it was. I managed to get within 100 yards.

 

Colby: The telephone wires?

 

Guy: Cut.

 

Colby: Good. WhatÕs the layout?

 

Guy: Well, the house is here. (Draws a square with his finger on the hood of the car) ThereÕs one guard out front. ThereÕs two more down on the beach.

 

Colby: WhereÕs Karpel?

 

Guy: I didnÕt see him.

 

Colby: All right, clean and simple then. You follow me to the house. I take the guard outside; you take the two on the beach.

 

Guy: Okay. (He gets back in the car; Colby goes back to KarenÕs. He gets in the back and puts the keys in the ignition.)

 

Colby: Now, dry your tears, Mrs. Karpel, because itÕs time to go. Just remember, IÕll be right behind you. (Pulls a gun. She starts the car and both cars drive off)

 

 

The Torino: Day

 

(Starsky and Hutch are driving along)

 

Starsky: Where is St. AndrewÕs point?

 

Hutch: When you get down to that beach road here make a right.

 

Starsky: TheyÕve got a 20 minute lead on us. LetÕs just hope Dobey called the police guards. (They make a right)

 

 

Turner Beach: Day

 

(KarenÕs car comes to a stop out side the house, by the beach)

 

Guard: Mrs. Karpel, where have you been? You had me worried. DonÕt ever do that again.

 

Karen: WhereÕs my husband?

 

Guard: HeÕs down there on the rocks, fishing. Here, IÕll give you a hand. (HeÕs about to open the back door, but Colby opens it, knocking the guard down. He knocks the guy out and goes for Karen)

 

Colby: Come on. (Drags her out of the car. He looks down to the beach where Karpel is fishing.) Move. (Gunshots are heard on the beach. Meanwhile, the Torino is still on itÕs way)

 

Hutch: There it is. The dirt road up there with the eucalyptus trees.

 

(Colby drags Karen down to the beach just as the Torino arrives. They park behind KarenÕs car, with their guns out. Starsky checks the guard)

 

Hutch: How is he?

 

Starsky: HeÕll live. 

 

(Colby forces Karen down the stairs to the beach while Hutch looks over the cliff and sees him)

 

Hutch: ItÕs Colby. I want him.

 

Starsky: I got the beach. (They separate. Starsky heads for where the guards are having a shoot out with GarvinÕs men. Starsky comes up behind one)

 

Starsky: Freeze! Police.  Drop it. Come on, drop it. Drop it. (The guy drops it) Stay. (He aims at the other one) Stand up! Come on, get up, get up. (The other guy drops it) Drop it. (The guards deal with the two men)

 

(Meanwhile, Colby is still making his way down the steps to the beach. Hutch reaches the steps and runs. Karpel sees them. Karen slips away for a second)

 

Karen: Warren! Warren! Run!

 

Colby: Shut up. (Pushes her forwards, Hutch is still following)

 

Hutch: Hold it John! (Karen makes him drop his gun. He tries to get it.) DonÕt do it! YouÕll never make it.   (He fires at the gun. Hutch approaches.) Mrs. Karpel, get out of here, go on. Go on. (She runs to her husband)

 

Colby: Hey, Hutch. You might as well shoot me right now, man; because IÕm not gonna make it to a trial. TheyÕre gonna have a contract out on me tomorrow.

 

Hutch: ThatÕs your problem, John.

 

Colby: No, no, itÕs yours, Hutch. (Stands up) Because I should have finished you in the alleyway. (Hutch picks up ColbyÕs gun)

 

Hutch: IÕm surprised you didnÕt.

 

Colby: I donÕt kill anyone that I donÕt get paid to kill.

 

Hutch: WhyÕs that, John?

 

Colby: Killing got to be real easy. IÕm good at it. A man oughta do what heÕs good at.

 

Hutch: Drop the sand. Drop it. (Colby drops it) Turn around.

 

(He turns and then kicks the gun out of HutchÕs hands. He follows it up with a kick, but Hutch blocks and hits back. The two go at it, throwing punches and kicks. They wrestle and hit and block. A well choreographed fight scene. Hutch manages to knock Colby flat on his front and turns him over)

 

Hutch: We donÕt get paid extra to kill people either. (Starsky comes over with the handcuffs and hands Hutch his gun)

 

Starsky: You drop something?

 

(Hutch takes it while Starsky slaps the cuffs on. They drag Colby up and away, while Corey runs to his mummy and itÕs all smiles.)

 

 

DobeyÕs Office: Day.

 

(StarskyÕs reading a magazine and Hutch is sat on the desk)

 

Dobey: Well, youÕre lucky the Feds didnÕt go to the commissioner. Otherwise youÕd be directing traffic on the docks. From the water.

 

Starsky: IÕm glad you talked them out of that.

 

Dobey: Who says I talked him out of it. (Hutch chuckles) You find this funny?

 

Hutch: Oh, no. No, I was just thinking thereÕs a lady out in the squad room waiting for Starsky.

 

Starsky: Lady? What lady?

 

Hutch: You remember Maggie McMillan. ItÕs that groovy old lady with the green and black Keiser Frazer.

 

Dobey: The one that the motorcycle gang kidnapped?

 

Starsky: ThatÕs the one. Well, you see Starsky here made a date with her.

 

Starsky: SheÕs not out there?

 

Hutch: Oh no, no, no, she couldnÕt make it. But she didnÕt want to disappoint you.

 

Starsky: Huh?

 

Hutch: So she sent a friend of hers over. Her nameÕs Abigail Crabtree. She seems like a real sweet lady. You know something, Starsky? If I wasnÕt all tied up IÕd join the two of you for a glass of warm milk.

 

Dobey Hey, both of you. Get out of here.

 

Hutch: Yes sir.

 

Dobey: Come on. (They head for the door. Starsky beats Hutch to the door and blocks it.)

 

Starsky: Hey.

 

Hutch: WhatÕs the matter?

 

Starsky: I canÕt go out there.

 

Hutch: But I told you sheÕs a real, nice, little lady. And IÕm sure you wouldnÕt want to disappoint her.

 

Starsky: Abigail Crabtree? SheÕs a friend of old lady McMillanÕs, Hutch, youÕve got to help me, please.

 

Hutch: What do you want me to do?

 

Starsky: I donÕt know, go out there, talk to her. Tell her I was transferred to the moon Something. Please, youÕre good with words.

 

Hutch: You sure you want me to do this?

 

Starsky: Yeah, be a pal, huh?

 

Hutch: Okay.

 

Starsky: Oh, thanks, thanks. (Starsky hides beside the door while Hutch enters the squad room)

 

Hutch: Miss. Crabtree? (Abigail turns out to be a pretty, young blonde) IÕm sorry I couldnÕt find Detective Starsky for you.

 

Abigail: Oh, I know, Mrs. McMillan is going to be so disappointed that I missed him.

 

Hutch: Yeah, I know. Well, look, thereÕs no reason that your trip down here has to be a complete waste. I am DavidÕs partner. And IÕd be more than happy to substitute for him.

 

Abigail: Oh, you wouldnÕt mind?

 

Hutch: No, it would be my pleasure. Can I help you with your coat?

 

Abigail: Thank you. (StarskyÕs still listening at the door)

 

Starsky: Cap? Please? (Dobey comes over) Take a look. Thanks. (Dobey looks out the door. He sees Hutch and Abigail. They both smile)

 

Dobey: Okay, Starsky, the coast is clear.

 

Starsky: Thanks. (He sees Hutch and Abigail together)

 

Hutch: Oh, captain, if you see Detective Starsky would you tell him IÕm taking care of Miss Crabtree here? (They leave)

 

Dobey: Hutchinson says heÕs taking care of Miss Crabtree. (Poor Starsky)

 

 

 

_________________________

 

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